Reminiscence

Been and back from sdk for CNY. It was a total blast. Meet up with good ol' jimuis and fellow classmates (aka The gang). Plenty of gambling, pictures, food, booze, love and angbaos sums up the entire trip. Family aside, the gang is the next most important group of ppl in my life. They are part of me. I am who I am for who they are. A bunch of beautiful and nice souls.

Hanging out with the gang reminds me of how time really past. The feelings is just like we were celebrating '06 CNY not long ago. But yet, another year has gone by. 4 years has passed since we last bid goodbye at the sch entrance and each and every of us travel a different path. Yet, for the same reason we meet again year after year without fail. No matter how we change, our friendship will remain at its truest and most solid of all. Especially to my ji muis, I'll always carry each and every of ur smiles and laughter with me.

Enough of wonderland, it's time to welcome myself back to reality. Tmr, 26/2/2007, mark the beginning of the month that I am dreading. 4 presentations, 1 test and exam. Welcome to the last bit of my life as a student~

Tired. Corrupted Mind.

Been preparing to embrace the hectic of the week after cny. It'll be close to hell.
Everything seems to be a daze. Too fast. I barely can catch up.
I read a book today on true stories about drug abusers. Well, I was half way through the book but it hit me real bad. Those "what if" questions keep on popping into my mind. What if one day I couldn't resist and hurl down the drain by those devastating substance? What if one of my friend is got into substance abuse? What if.. what if.. what if..
For quite sometime already I've been questioning myself - what is my belief? who am I really?
I am confused.
It seems like I'm having a delayed identity confusion.
It's a struggle. My goal, it seems so clear in my mind but yet it seems like a haze.

I can't see, I can't feel,
Cold. Numbed.
Lend me a torch,
Lighten up my path.
Where are you, usher?
I can't see, I can't feel.